I'm floundering. Really floundering. There's so much here ... There's just so much I want to say, but it's all based in hate and rage and fear. I put the words down, then strike them out. These are all the secret things. What lives in my dark hallways. I need to spell them out, but they need to remain unwritten. So hard I've tried ... so hard I've tried to build a stable home. So hard I've failed, so far I've fallen. When everything I've created lies bleeding on the kitchen floor, what will I have left? Memories. Regrets. Tales someone else has written. This is not me, this life divided. But it's the only me there is. Hiding from the bogeyman. I search for every light in the darkness, but no matter which way I turn, it's always the same. I'm lost.

-J

Define reality. Define real.